When

I remember when I was first diagnosed. It was one of the happiest times of my life because I saw it as a means to end...and a new beginning. It meant that I was finally given a chance to be happy. I wanted to know how that felt. To be happy, and not cry all the time, and sleep my days away, or not sleep at all. It meant BALANCE. I went to my other blog, Being Processed , and began to cry...again. As I read through older posts I can see where my thought patterns were, how I allowed my thoughts to come to life, how that fog was lifted and I had clarity. This was when I was on meds, and in therapy twice a week. I miss that Amber. I miss her alot. I feel like I am being tortured, and I'm doing it to myself. But, as much as I hate to admitt it, I'm going to need help getting back on track. Can you help me? I really want to get better...but I know I can't do it alone...PLEASE HELP ME!